Coffee Talk: Calling Bullshit on "Doing it All"


In the past month, I've been doing a lot of reevaluating certain things in my life. I've been seeing a wellness coach to deal with my picky eating and to make some lifestyle changes I've wanted to make for a while.

During this process, something I've been thinking about lately is this idea of "doing it all". In today's world, we're supposed to do everything—go to a job we love, work out, enjoy eating only the healthiest food, meditate, have hobbies, practice self care, see our friends and family regularly... it's all too much!

Am I the only one who feels this way?

Much of my life revolves around the idea of minimalism—I like living with less, and one of my favorite activities is regularly getting rid of things I don't need or that don't bring me joy. I love having less. So why do I feel like I need to do it all?

In my recent wellness sessions, I've been toying around with the idea of simply getting rid of the things in my life that aren't bringing me joy, similar to what I do with my physical possessions. Headspace, for example, is an app I've tried to use for a year on and off—but I just don't enjoy meditating. I've tried countless apps, meditated in countless places, and made time for it, but I still don't like it. So why do I do it?

how to start doing less

I am no expert, but come along on this journey with me for a minute. Make a list that has three columns: things you have to do (like go to work—sorry, no getting around that one!), things you love doing, and other things you don't love doing. While you're making this list, be honest with yourself about what you love and what you don't. For me, things like meditating, being on my devices too much, and going to certain functions fall under the "don't love" list—so I'm starting to cut them out of my life. It's okay to not want to do it all!

set boundaries in your life

If you don't want to keep filling your time with things you don't want to do, you need to cut them out of your life. For some things, it's as easy as getting rid of an app, but for others, it's about setting new expectations for the people in your life. The more you limit the things you don't want to be spending time on, the more time you'll have to enjoy the things you do love! For me, this is things like cooking new recipes, working on my blog, and exploring San Francisco.

do you feel like you have to do it all? let me know how you cope in the comments section!